A bad mood, a rant, and then a list of things for which I am thankful, just to even the score and brighten the mood a bit

I liked this picture a week and a half ago when I chose to put it up on this blog (I've been trying to choose photos in advance), but now I'm kind of bored with it.  I saw this little horsey at the Choijin Lama Temple Museum.  There were a few there, but since they were so low to the ground,a nd since I have arthritis in my back and am not always comfortable kneeling down or turning my body in weird positions to get good shots, this is the best picture I got, even though I think some of the other little horseys were prettier/more interesting.

I've been in a pitiful mood this week.  Actually, it's been a disgusting bad mood.  Everything seems wrong in my life at the moment.  My boss won't give me my passport back (and I'm really worried about that), my work was three days late paying me, and even then I didn't get all the money that was owing to me, I haven't met many people yet in Ulaanbatar (I may be a loner, but I also like knowing that I have friends I can hang out with if I need/want to), and, ...

[The rest of this rant concerned my desire to go to law school and my inability to gain admission to law school.  I'm going to try one more time to apply to law school and, in the interest of preserving my good image which any law schools might maybe have of me, I have deleted the rest of this rant, lest this blog or this post become too terribly popular and the law schools figure out who I am and see this rant in a negative light].

I'm trying not to nurse my bad mood or feed into any poor me feelings (despite my previous rant), but I just can't seem to break out of it.  I hope this bad mood ends soon.  I know my bad moods are my own responsibility, that I should be able to break out of one at any time I choose to, but it really isn't like that.  I want to be happier.  I want to be nicer.  I just can't.  I have to start thinking happier thoughts.  So, I made a list of all the things in my life for which I am grateful:

• I have a stable job, which isn't too demanding.
• I am cooking for myself again.  I love to cook, and, in Korea, I wasn't cooking for myself at all because of my very tiny kitchen and the fact that I lacked things like counter space and a fridge.  Now, I have a real kitchen (although I still don't have an oven), and I am cooking for myself again.  I love coming home and wondering 'What am I going to make myself for dinner tonight?' and knowing exactly what ingredients are going into my meal, because I'm the one putting it together.
• I now have a computer at hom.  It's not hooked up to the internet, yet, but hey! at least I've got a computer at home now!
• I have weekly tickets to the ballet/opera, and it's not costing me a fortune.  I love the opera, and I love the ballet more.  And I love the fact that the most expensive ticket to the ballet/opera here is the equivalent of $6.25.
• I am almost all finished my Christmas shopping, and I'm really excited about the gifts I've chosen for all the people I love.  I hope they like their gifts as much as I like em!
• I am healthy and my arthritis is 99.99% under control.  It not longer controls my life; I control it.
• I have more than enough clothes and, even though many of my clothes are starting to be too big for me and I'm not sure where I'm going to find affordable clothes which I really like in Ulaanbaatar, I am thankful that a lot of my clothes are too big for me, because it means that I am losing a lot of weight and getting closer to my old weight, and I feel really good about myself.
• I have parents who love me, even if I don't get to see them very often.
• My ugly haircut is growing out.
• I brought about ten books with me to Mongolia, and I'm thankful for this because there are not any bookstores here that have any kind of selection at all of English books and/or magazines.  After I finish reading the books I brought with me, I've still got the Sony Reader which my brother gave me for Christmas last year, and I was looking through it the othe week, and I think I'll really like it.
• I have friends offereing to mail me licorice (and other friends offering to mail me other fun parcels).
• I'm starting to get my debt under control, despite the fact that I'm currently only making 1000USD/month in Mongolia.  I don't think debt will ever be a problem in my life again.
• I can speak a second language, even if I'm not always eloquent in it-- hell! I'm not always eloquent in my first language, so who cares!?
• Ulaanbaatar is a pleasant surprise.  I generally like this city, despite occasional bitchings and a few bad days here and there.
• I crave adventure, and I've built a life (and a career) that ensures that I've got enough adventure and new experiences in my life.
• I may not love my career (I would sincerely prefer to study law and work in the legal profession), but at least I have a career, and at least I have a job, and at least I love some aspects of my career (such as the fact that it is necessary for me to travel to different countries, since my career is teaching ESL abroad).

A little horsey at the Choijin Lama Temple Museum in Ulaanbaatar